How to catch a lion???!!!

(This was found in an email that Dans sent me...
Before you read further, I want to present you with a great quote from a great man.. (or alien)
"Guns don't kill people... Physics kill people" - Dr. Dick Solomon [3rd rock from the sun])

"Even if you didn't study Physics in college , just read thru. After all catching a lion does require some effort.
Six scientific ways to catch a lion :
1. Newton's Method :
Let the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. It implies you caught the lion.
2. Einstein Method :
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion. Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.
3. Schrodinger M! ethod:
At any given moment, there is a positive probability that lion to be in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait.
4. Inverse Transformation Method:
Place a spherical cage in the forest and enter it. Perform an inverse transformation with respect to lion. Lion is in and we are out.
5. Thermodynamic Procedure:
Construct a semi-permeable membrane which allows everything to pass it except lions. Then sweep the entire forest with it.
6. Integration Differential Method:
Integrate the forest over the entire area. The lion is some where in the result. So differentiate the result PARTI! ALLY w.r.t lion to trace out the lion.

GOT FRUSTRATE D ?
now lets kill the lion...

Govinda method: Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days.
Rahul Dravid method: Ask the lion to bowl at u. U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run. Lion dies after a spurt of continuous madness.
Menaka Gandhi method: Save the lion from danger and feed him with vegetables continuously.
George Bush method : Link the lion with Osama Bin Laden and shoot him. "